Sunday 10 July 2016

I'll take care of you ...

I've put off posting for several days now, feeling irritable and growly. After a short paragraph of moaning about nothing, I've abandoned each post as a draft. I'm wondering if I sit here and have a good ole gripe about something, will I feel any better? Will I feel any worse? Do I even know what's getting me down? Am I just having a moment week of self pity? I hope not, I don't like the sound of that. I suspect I am though.

Just now I would like to have someone strong by my side. Someone capable and kind. Caring,  helpful and generous. Someone who would say; I'll take care of things for now, you rest. I'll get you a coffee, a sandwich, a meal ...  I'll pay the bills this month. I'll go get the washing in ... I'll clean the loo, the floor, the windows ... I'll fix the gate, the garden, your mind ... decorate the bedroom and lounge ... mow the lawn ... put the bins out ... blah blah blah.

Is that it. No, there's more.

So after writing that last line, not wanting this to turn into a gripe fest, I had a break and went downstairs ... I put the rubbish out (because no one else will) and almost tripped over Geekster's (£90) trainers that had been left on the outside doorstep."Why are these outside?"... "O I got cow muck on them over the field"... I see, so will it miraculously disappear if they are left on the doorstep? Or will they just be left out here in the rain to rot? Or will 'the faires' come along and fix them? 
"Someone's in a bad mood" he's right there.

Any more?

I ignored the heap of pots and plates that need washing; the line full of dry washing that needs bringing in; the pile of clean, wet washing that needs hanging out; the load of clean, dry washing that needs putting away; the washing basket full of bedding waiting to be washed ... washing, washing, more sodding washing! I fed Eddy because no one else will and I wouldn't ignore that sort of thing. I don't often feel like this.

I don't feel any better or worse for moaning.  Still irritable. It will pass and I will get on with doing the chores without a second thought. It's just the way it is, for now.




17 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Yes, fortunately not too often. I love your post this morning. Perfect timing x

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  2. Somedays the belief in fairies (the washing fairy, the toilet paper fairy, the cleaning up cat-chuck fairy...) IS intensely irritating.
    Heartfelt hugs and oceans of caring.

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    1. So true! Hamper G pulled out one of her last baby teeth last night and wanted to leave it for the tooth fairy... I told her the tooth fairy was on holiday until Wednesday (pay day!)Damn fairies.
      Hugs gratefully received, thankyou xx

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  3. I hear you girlfriend!! What you need is a wife! Things always get better, we just keep putting one foot in front of the other. It won't be long, and before you know it, they'll all be moved out, and you might even live all by yourself, and just sometimes miss having someone to look after :-0
    But feel free to gripe as much as you want, if you can't do it here, then where else can you do it. No judging here. :)
    Laura

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  4. Life is full of chores. Hope things improve for you soon. I came here from Elephant's Child blog. :)

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    1. Isn't it just. Thanks for popping over. I remember seeing you there and at Jean's blog years ago. Take care xx

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    2. How is Jean, I haven't heard from her for years!

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  5. Yes, a wife! Sounds good to me. I know, I do try to think ahead and know that I will miss them one day but when that growliness sets in there is no reasoning.
    Feeling much better today though. I couldn't beleive the timing last night after sitting here for hours. So glad you're back here, Thanks xx

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  6. I'm so happy to see you posting again!! I loved seeing pics of your kids, too! It's been ages, they've grown so much. :)

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    1. Hi Summer, it has been a while yes, I'm going to try and post at least once a week; my effort at self discipline of some kind.
      I always end up staying up too late when I get onto writing and reading blogs/comments etc.. its 1am again! Thanks for being here x

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  7. So glad to see you back:)

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    1. :) I wondered if you still came here, I'm glad you do xx

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    2. I thought you were another anon... now I'm confused xx

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  8. I forgot to ask, what made you comeback to blogland?

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    1. Good question John ... I always missed it, when I allowed myself to. Occasionally I came back to snoop about, but I felt so bad about disappearing and leaving good, caring people wondering where I was... that I just 'avoided' it, rather than facing it... I'm good at that sort of behavior.
      Sometimes my Son would pull my Blog up on his phone screen (in an effort to make me re connect) but even just seeing my header made me so sad. Avoidance followed.
      Mostly I missed connecting with folk, as I dont do much of that in real life, but also sorting out my feelings by having to think enough to write had helped me in the past ... but I feared I had left it too long.
      Then the evening of the 'rare event' post I just thought what the hell I have nothing to lose and everything to gain and I posted. I'm so glad I did. Thanks for being here John and thanks for asking xx

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