Thursday 12 April 2012

Just for today


I'll write this post in the morning as I've left my glasses at my first N/A meeting or in Mum's car. Either way I;m struggling to see what I'm typing. I'm also tired, but I like what I've found. Shit! a hamster just ran across the landing! Never mind how he got out . . . How did he do the stairs?

O well I'll deal with the whole lot in the morning. I've dealt with enough for today. And I'm glad I have. I really am. Sweet dreams and days to you all.

17 comments:

  1. Andrew tried everything for years to get clean. And tried everything to keep using without consequences for years. Then he tried substituting for his drug of choice for years. But he is an addict, and he can't use, and he can't drink, and he can't gamble. He takes everything to excess, no matter what it is.

    When he was serious...really serious...he went to NA. He got a sponsor. He calls his sponsor. Some days he goes to three meetings a day. He has made friends. They go out to eat together, they play baseball, they help each other find work. There is nothing as effective as addicts helping other addicts, IMO.

    Parents of addicts can tell you all sorts of things, but bottom line, we don't know what addiction, especially heroin addiction, is like. Other addicts know. Other addicts know when you are bullshitting yourself, and they will call you on it.

    There must be some people who "just quit" or "do it alone" but I don't know any. Everyone I know who has any amount of clean time has done so with some kind of support..either medication, NA, Smart Recovery, forums. There is a saying in NA- "my mind is a dangerous place to go alone."

    Sorry for the long comment. Take what you need, and leave the rest.

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    1. Lou . . Just woke up, still not got my glasses back so I've 200%'ed the screen . . . and I've still nearly got my nose on it ;-)
      No need to apologize for length of commemt, it all makes good sense. I love the place and the people. I would be there every day if I could, I'll write a post about it . . . otherwise I'll write it all here.
      I immediately felt wanted, welcome and with people I could totally trust. Only three of them but that's three more than I knew yesterday. Three people who've all had over 10 years each on that crap and other crap . . . and beat it.
      I'd been hard on myself because when my Brother beat it in prison, he never went back . . . But I'm not my brother. (he had 4 yrs on it with no children or responsibilities) And then the other night I read "Comparison is the theif of Joy" on a blog . . . and it is.
      I'm so glad I went and as soon as I get my glasses back I'll post on it. I'm really squinting here.
      Thanks Lou x

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    2. ps . . . and a dog! there's a dog there in recovery. Love and hugs to you Lou

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  2. I am so fucking proud of you I could spit! It was so hard for me to go to my first meeting but OMG the feeling once I was finally there. Let them help you. Give it up and get it done.

    Love and hugs girl...don't be a stranger. We're here for you too!

    Sherry

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    1. Sherry,
      I nearly spat my coffee all over the screen laughing!
      I loved it, will post as soon as I get my glasses back . . . I'll get wrinkles squinting like this.
      I'll always be here Sherry . . . This is gonna be one long story, plus I intend to continue with the "past story" as I go along.
      Thanks for being here Sherry. Love and hugs to you x

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  3. Fantastic! Look forward to hearing how the meeting went. So great. Sweet dreams xxx

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    1. Mrs D.
      Thanks! Yep, just waiting for a text re glasses so I can post. Thanks for being here. I'm so happy I can barely contain myself :-) Love and hugs to you.

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  4. Joining with SoberMumRocks. I too am just sooooo proud. And the hamsters can indeed wait another day.
    You rock. (blogger's two word verification caper on the other hand sucks)

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    1. TE's C
      O Wow . . . I'd forgotten about the hamster! I really had. There better only be one on the loose, because if there are two and one is a male and . . . Yes, you guessed the rest. O My. Doesn't bear thinking about.
      I hate those two squiggly words too.
      Thanks for being here and I hope all things are improving for you. Love and hugs to you and SP ;-) (I'm in a loving, hugging mood today)

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  5. That is wonderful!! I attended NA with a close friend many moons ago because she was a bit scared to go alone the first time...and guess what...she's been clean for 20 yrs now!!!

    You Rock!! Very proud of you!!

    Hugs...xoxo...

    p.s. good luck with your little hamster friend...heehee ;)

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    1. Hi JJ
      I've only just found you here. Yes my Mum wanted to come with me in case I got "sidetracked" (yes I'm 49) . . . It's a good job she didn't as she physically flinches when she hears the "F" word . . . and there was plenty of that.
      Thanks JJ, love and hugs to you too

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  6. Wow, I am also so proud of you! It takes a fair amount of courage to walk through those doors that first time and you did it and you made some good connections. So happy for you?

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    1. Annette,
      Yes, I did it. And I'm so glad I did. I'm gonna try and post today about it. Try. (MUM!! pass me the sticker book)
      Love and hugs x

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  7. I'm proud Lovey! You already know I never did NA, I quit cold turkey and it was a bitch!!! I may have avoided a lot of other things in my life had I walked through those doors twenty plus years ago. Now I'm going to a different kind of step meeting and it's changing my life...the friendships you'll make, they are like none you've made before. These people get it, Lovey. They understand. They don't judge. They love unconditionally. It rocks and so do you!!

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    1. Lovey, Yes it's a very effective yet simple concept . . . Addicts helping addicts. Any other "help" I've previously had (drugs workers) has had that "something" missing. You're right, these people get it AND they don't judge. I want to get back there already.
      Thanks with love and hugs x

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  8. You are awesome, Buger. Glad that you picked up the surrender chip and are going to meetings. I agree with Lou--it's better to be in the company of those who have what you want: sobriety. My wife hasn't had a drink since several days before her first AA meeting. I consider that a miracle.

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    1. Ah Thanks Syd . . . I need to find a "babysitter" for Hamper G so I can get out to more meetings. I really felt the benefit and I want/need some more of that.
      That is a miracle Syd . . . And look how your life together is now. Beautiful.

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